Reads well, the idea of solving one's personal issues before they become parts of some mid-life crisis. ... It feels like shit. Honestly, some days, I don't know how I get out the door and in to the city.
Alienated. Segregated. Frustrated.
I'm balancing on the tip of an iceberg of which one side I've thoroughly explored. Color me scared out of my wits at the prospect of sliding down to the other end.
One of my greatest fears is of no longer being most of what's outwardly defined me in my earlier years. Because, I fear: there, I won't have an identity—dark or light, in the feel of its presence—I'll be no one.
I'm dealing with these issues in a way as productive and proactive as I feel I can currently manage. But it's exhausting. I don't like having to exercise strength so continuously. It feels unnatural.
And I thought this blog entry was going to tie up more neatly. Oh, well...
I want the good news to be great news. It's not great yet. Not yet.
Alienated. Segregated. Frustrated.
I'm balancing on the tip of an iceberg of which one side I've thoroughly explored. Color me scared out of my wits at the prospect of sliding down to the other end.
One of my greatest fears is of no longer being most of what's outwardly defined me in my earlier years. Because, I fear: there, I won't have an identity—dark or light, in the feel of its presence—I'll be no one.
I'm dealing with these issues in a way as productive and proactive as I feel I can currently manage. But it's exhausting. I don't like having to exercise strength so continuously. It feels unnatural.
And I thought this blog entry was going to tie up more neatly. Oh, well...
I want the good news to be great news. It's not great yet. Not yet.
